Tuesday, April 28, 2009
My eyes mock me, refusing to reveal what must truly be there. The Gates of Hell rise before me, tears and sweat dripping off the creatures falling down, falling up the doors.
I can smell their fear; or is it my own? It tingles in my nose and the sweat standing in the air makes me freeze.
The drops touch my forehead, an ironic blessing, and tickle my arms on their way to the ground. The caress lingers and they laugh in my ears.
It is so silent: too silent for this scene, this place. Only the trickling of raindrops breaks through the invisible sound barrier and I open my mouth to scream, to crash into reality.
I taste the metal on my tongue and I can't help but swallow. It is sharp, acidic, and cruel. It bites me back and I can taste the horrors.
My senses tell me yes, but this cannot be true.
The bronze sculpture stares back, mocking.
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
"What do you think?"
"I'd never do that."
"Can you believe--"
"No I can't."
"What did you expect?"
"Than what she already gave?"
"Yes! Of course!"
"You can't be naive."
"Who are you mad at?"
"Her. Sorry. Not you."
"I know, but still..."
"I'm sorry, ok?"
"I'll never forgive her."
"Believe me, I know."
"I'm better off, anyway."
"Come kiss me."
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
I knew you were disappointed in me, as was I. I could tell you that life got busy, that new things came up. I could tell you, and it's true, that I still thought about you. A lot. But that will sound like an excuse, because it is. And if that isn't valid, I'm left without reason.
Yes, I was avoiding you. I didn't want to face my failure. I'm sorry.
Life is going better, though! You get to be involved in another part of my life, something that might go somewhere! That doesn't justify leaving you behind in the truly important capacity, though. My stories have been lonely and my poetry, silent.
I will try to do better and I will do my utmost not to avoid you again. I cannot promise, for promises are too easy to break and too hard to forgive. But I can try.
If you will take me back, I am ready to start again.